Heart of Darkness

Southampton 3 – 3 Spurs
Saturday 18th March 2023

Sometimes I let matches burn down to my fingertips just to feel something, anything. Today for some reason I was sure I was going to feel something.

For the past 6 weeks spring has been flirting with me. Nature’s prick tease. It’s now mid March and despite the drizzle, grey clouds and rain, the forecast promised spells of sunshine on the south coast. Nothing compliments an away day better than a few cold beers. My last few trips I’ve had to drive and the football has been more than sobering, so I’m looking forward to this excursion south west on the train with a few tinnies.

This optimistic spring in my step was short lived with the news of the trains cancelling due to yet more strikes. So this time Mark is driving. I can at least have a couple and sure enough as we arrive on the south coast, the sun beamed down on us as we walked along the bank of the Itchen before cutting in through an industrial estate making our way to St.Mary’s.

If you’re cut from the same age cloth as I, Southampton away means only one thing…Ronny Rosenthal. However, to most it’s a coastal town with a rich maritime history. The Titanic famously set sail from its port and much like the ship built to be unsinkable, Conte has attempted to build a philosophy of football at Spurs much the same, yet the only similarity sadly is their respective destinies.

And that my friends is just the tip of the iceberg. In truth, I’m more inclined to think of the Nellie, a much smaller vessel which set sail into the Heart Of Darkness. “It was written I should be loyal to the nightmare of my choice…” – these words reverberate as Conte’s Colonel Kurtz like post match comments hit me in the stomach like a brick through a window. The horror, the horror.

Spurs fans were in good voice for the first 20 mins or so before the usual out on the pitch began to play out. Not creating much and appearing to let the Saints have all the possession and grow in confidence. The game lulled, culminating in the home fans singing ‘Football League trophy, you’ll never sing that’ to which the Spurs fans retorted ‘Audi Cup, you’ll never sing that’.

I was amused temporarily and this was certainly the highlight of the first half. That was until an older gentleman who appeared to have pegs for teeth suddenly barked ‘WHY DON’T YOU JUST FUCK OFF!?’ at me. I’m not entirely sure the reasoning for this outburst but I do feel he had a point. I was soon kissing him on the forehead in a frantic embrace after Pedro Porro had smashed in the opener and things were looking up.

After the Wolves game I wrote about being ok with us not winning so long as ‘we’d given it a go’ and played expansive attacking football and perhaps on paper this game looked like a thriller, but it wasn’t and despite being 1-3 up it was still shit. We made the team who are rock bottom of the league look like a force to be reckoned with. Spurs are set up to be a counter attacking team, yet don’t counter attack more often than not, even when the opportunity presents itself. And with 15mins to go and a 2 goal advantage, it’s the one time we wouldn’t mind a bit of Conte-ball, sure things up, bring a defender on etc. Yet somehow we throw the game entirely.

If nothing changes, nothing changes. Our next fixture is Everton away on 3rd April. Despite Conte effectively writing out his own P45 in the post match press conference, he will still be in charge and the football will be very much the same. I can’t wait.