The 1901 Cup Final

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I peer over to the bar to see a man in his seventies, on his own. he is falling asleep on his stool. He has a copy of the racing post on his lap. It's only purpose in to disguise the saucer sized patch of urine on his grubby cream slacks.
I thought you said you had good banter with your Dad !
 
I'm confused, are you still in Wetherspoons in Swindon ? That menu seems far superior to what I remember, in the days that I had to slum it. Thank fuck I got myself out of that downward spiral of surf and turf, onion rings and a free pint. Oh, I get it, you will do anything for a free pint. That means you can use that money to put towards some, what is it, Golden Virginia ? If I was you I would stick to the Butts, save the money, then in about 5 years you might even be able to afford a decent drug of choice. In your case, I'd put my money on Rohyp.
 
There's a girl in the corner with a black eye, she's sobbing quietly. I think I've shagged her before after a night out in Yates. I'm too embarrassed to approach her. No point anyway, I haven't been able to get it up since the accident. The stitches in my neck don't come out for another three weeks and the limp is still pronounced.

What time is it anyway? What day is it even? Must be during the week, it's empty in here.

I DON'T WANT TO GO HOME, I DIDN'T EVEN CLEAN UP THE SICK!

The girl/woman in the corner is your Sister, the black eye is self inflicted when she found out you were her brother. Yates, are you fuckin kidding me, Wetherspoons rely on your custom to keep them in fish fingers. Where's your loyalty man. As for the limp, I would imagine that is due to the genital infection you picked up somewhere between Wetherspoons and Yates. As for the time, as I said before, it's way past your bedtime, yes, I know it's the holidays for you, but you know your housemaster likes you in bed nice and early. Don't worry, you won't be empty for long, sweet dreams.
 
The girl/woman in the corner is your Sister, the black eye is self inflicted when she found out you were her brother. Yates, are you fuckin kidding me, Wetherspoons rely on your custom to keep them in fish fingers. Where's your loyalty man. As for the limp, I would imagine that is due to the genital infection you picked up somewhere between Wetherspoons and Yates. As for the time, as I said before, it's way past your bedtime, yes, I know it's the holidays for you, but you know your housemaster likes you in bed nice and early. Don't worry, you won't be empty for long, sweet dreams.

Just end it. For the sake of the gene pool.
 
You will have to remind of Wengers presser, being a Spurs(y) fan I don't find myself getting too wrapped up up with that prick. Obviously the Arse lovers always tune in, I'm guessing that's where you come in.
So, what was said RED. :dempsey:
 
Its a geek off.

"I have never been to a game but I have a fully intact; still in its plastic; programme of the 1932 league cup 3rd round clash with Aldershot Town, or Aldershot FC as they were known back then" *Nasal voice*

i was going to join this forum , (1st post) but this f*ckhead has kept me away , been a Spurs
fan since 1978 , live in Australia , 1st generation Aussie , my whole family Edmonton born , all Spurs ,
i have spent over 50 grand flying to the UK every year since i started earning a pay check (1986) just
to watch Spurs home and away (2-4 games per visit) thousands of dollars on kits etc .. and thanks to
the internet i have collected over 500 programs , including every 1950-51 & 1960-61 home and
away yet i am deemed not SPURSY enough for this pillock , give me a f*cking break , i bet Carlito
eats McDonalds but isn't from Arkansas , maybe drives a Ford but not from Detroit , absolute
tosser
 
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