The Police traffic officer is called PC Skidmore!!
Former England and Chelsea footballer Ray Wilkins was too drunk to stand when he was stopped for driving his car erratically, a court has been told.
Mr Wilkins, 56, slurred his words and leaned on his Jaguar XP for support when he was pulled over near his Cobham home in May 2012, magistrates heard.
North Surrey Magistrates' Court also heard he fell asleep in a police patrol car and later swore at officers.
Mr Wilkins denies a charge of drinking and driving.
Tests taken at a police station showed he was almost three times the legal limit.
'Strong smell of liquor'
The former England midfielder was arrested on 7 May last year after his car was seen "weaving" down the road at about 01:45 BST, the court heard.
It was alleged Mr Wilkins's car had "lurched" forward and then hit a traffic island.
PC Nicholas Skidmore told the court: "There was a strong smell of intoxicating liquor in the vehicle and around him.
"When he got out of the vehicle, he couldn't stand up properly," he said.
"He had to lean against the car."
The officer said he handcuffed the Sky Sports football pundit, who then fell asleep in his unmarked police car.
'Absolutely ridiculous'
The court was told Mr Wilkins was then taken to a local police station where he was told he could not make a call to his wife until he had provided two breath samples.
CCTV played to the court showed him apparently trying to complete the tests.
He was heard to swear to officers before saying: "I can't even phone my missus.
"I'm not going to bash up anybody - this is ridiculous, absolutely ridiculous."
PC Skidmore told the hearing: "[He said] he knew that he had done wrong and he wanted to speak to his wife as soon as possible."
The footballer won 84 caps for England and played for clubs including AC Milan, Chelsea and Manchester United during a career that spanned three decades.
In 1993 he was appointed MBE for services to football.
The case continues.
