-There are numerous dictionaries and they're not identical. Plus the work of a dictionary is to collect the meanings they find in use, not to tell people which meaning is proper
-In some countries following The Enlightenment they created official language institutions (like France), they tried codifying languages but they find themselves chasing the native speakers constantly (e.g. the French spelling reform two years ago).
-don't quite get the thing about sounding the same and meaning. two words can be written in the same way but pronounced differently (US to UK version of herb), two words could be written differently but denote to the same meaning 'pants'-'trousers'. The point here is the 'fucking hell' and 'fucken hell' mean exactly the same thing.
-most academic linguists would even doubt the existence of solid grammar for a language let alone rigid spelling rules, the only interest in misspelling is when it is accompanied by some learning disability (knowing the specific lingual conventions but failing to implement them).
-fucken and fucking are different words, the point was that none was more valid than the other to use. you don't err when you write fucken and you're Scottish, like the American doesn't err when he says gas instead of petrol.
-I'm not a native English speaker but I'm guilty of doing this in Hebrew. Correcting spelling 'mistakes' is often a condescending act that allows you to humiliate and disregard the other side without actually listening to what they had to say. Someone is not inherently stupid because he writes 'innit', and spelling correction is a social tool for silencing them or others.
No, no, no. Your last paragraph is daft. You don’t seem to be able to differentiate between written dialogue and correct spelling - entirely different things. You obviously make an effort to spell words correctly when you post on here and the reason is that you want to be taken seriously. Your attention to detail literally undermines your entire argument. I read recently that you were applying for an academic post at a number of British Universities. Were you brave enough to apply your theory in the application process? Or did you have a dictionary open at every step just to make sure that every word you submitted was dictionary perfect? I’d suggest the latter was true.
You might be a cavalier on here, but in the real world you’re as hide bound as the rest of of us. You want to spell correctly because you don’t want to appear stupid - especially in the eyes of people who are in a position to give you a job.